Argylle

Bait and Switch

Jiří Stacho

2/10/20241 min read

Ok, this movie pissed me off. I went to the cinema expecting to see a fun spy comedy like Knight and Day with Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz. Instead, I got a cat lady's power fantasy.

Henry Cavill is one of the most likeable actors working today. I'm convinced that if he was born 20 or even 10 years earlier, he would have been one of the biggest movie stars in Hollywood. But since we live in the age we do... Needless to say, I want his movies to be successful. It’s a shame; he’s wasting his best years in bad movies and shows.

I was looking forward to Argylle as it was advertised as spy comedy with Henry Cavill in the lead role. Imagine my surprise when I saw the movie and found out he's only in it for a few minutes. Sam Rockwell and Bryce Dallas Howard are the leads. While I don't care for Howard, I like Rockwell as much as the next guy. He's an entertaining performer and hardly ever disappoints. However, this is about the misleading or downright deceitful marketing of this film. All the major posters, stills, behind the scenes material, everything is portrayed in a way to suggest that Cavill is the lead. They played us dirty and if the word of mouth is anything to go by, the movie will suffer in the box office because of it.

Another reason why its box office failure is probable is that the movie itself is crap. It's not funny or intriguing and the plot is convoluted. The runtime is way too long. Oh, and there's a cat. I'm not going to go into details, as this article is not a review but angry post about blatantly false promotional campaign to mislead the audience. Looking back, there were warning signs, such as Howard's casting and Matthew Vaugn being an overrated director who, since the first Kingsman hasn't really made a good movie. But still, I thought with Cavill in the lead, it's going to be at the very least competent.

Cavill's upcoming movie is the Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare, which hits the theaters sometime later this year. Let's hope it'll be much better than this mess.

All in all, Henry Cavill should finally fire his agent.